Being Professional

Last week my friend and colleague, Denise Brown, blogged about her experience working at the Chicago Tribune in response to a New York Times article about that company’s culture. According to the article, the environment at the Tribune had become untenable thanks in large part to a new top executive, Randy Michaels. According to the article, and to my friend, Michaels's leadership encouraged a culture of intimidation, sexual impropriety, denial, exclusion and generally frat-boy like behavior. Those who participated did well, those who did not didn't.

As a New Yorker, the stories my friend described were not shocking. In a city full of highly ambitious people, tolerating inappropriate behavior in superiors can go with the territory of career advancement. But for me it did bring up a question I've thought about a lot: What is it to be professional? I can't count the number of times I heard someone be called a "professional" for being cold and distant, hiding their intent, or avoiding emotional elements in their communication.

At its core, being a professional is knowing one's craft and making a living at it. In our very complex corporate worlds, being a professional is more complicated. This summer I read The Grapes of Wrath, by John Steinbeck. When Pa Joad is being kicked off his land, he is told, "The company is not a man." Meaning that, the company does not bear the sort of human responsibility that small business bosses, neighbors, friends, families, bear towards one another. From this perspective, why not misbehave? After all, no one is really responsible.

Maybe it sounds negative, but to me there is truth here. In today's work environments those with power can act however they want to. They are not responsible. Many senior executives don't manage their concerns and frustrations, and instead yell at subordinates. Then, the mid and lower level employees behave like robots. Unfortunately, the very same doubts and frustrations, if expressed, are viewed as negative from someone at their level. So, it becomes a Darwinian story of competition, where some devise ways to get to the top just so they can behave how they want to.

I'd like to offer another perspective. Corporate life is here to stay. And being human is here to stay. Why not let employees at all levels be authentic at work? I hear coach after coach compare notes and say that within ten minutes of the first meeting, their corporate clients are talking about their personal lives and how to be more authentic at work. What's more, I've seen first hand how mid-management clients who are authentic at work actually advance better than when they were trying to fit a "professional" mold. So for our own progress, and for one another, how about coming from a place of dignity, support, healthy competition and pleasure in a job well done? What could work be like if we could progress, be our best selves, and not be afraid or uncomfortable? What profits could corporations see if they actually got the most out of their employees?

In Pursuit of Excellence

Last Sunday I attended a concert by the Vienna Philharmonic at Carnegie Hall, featuring Yoyo Ma and conducted by Gustavo Dudamel. I've seen beautiful concerts, but this is the first time I've been moved to tears. It felt important, transformational, and it has stayed with me.

What is it that is so important about transcendental levels of excellence? Coaches spend so much time focusing on balance, calm, being present and acknowledging the small successes. So where does the crazy, unbalanced, destabilizing pursuit of excellence fit in? And why do we need it so badly?

In truth coaches also spend a lot of time on fulfillment. And fulfillment by definition is about urgency, purpose and impact. When you think about Mozart and how he locked himself in a room, not eating or stopping until his work was finished, you see fulfillment at work. Dan Pink talks about three intrinsic motivators: autonomy, mastery and purpose. Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi in his 1998 book Finding Flow, reveals how having that sense of larger purpose and your impact on others, makes it easier to take pleasure in the ups and downs of everyday life. In my coaching program (CTI), they say that, "Living a fulfilling life is a radical act."

Next time you are wondering whether doing what you love and being someone you can be proud to be is worth it, remember that between evenings performing at Carnegie Hall, Yoyo Ma has plenty of tedious rehearsals and photo shoots. Excellence is not about ease and bliss every moment, but it is about drinking from one of life's renewable sources.

Personal Innovation

This morning a client who is job-hunting said, "I came to you because what I've done in the past isn't working in this economy. I am open to trying a new approach." Wow, what courage! When an accomplished professional with significant success is willing to try something totally new, to me it shows enormous strength of character. With this in mind, I was inspired to do a little research around innovation. Innovation is such a hot topic in business literature; how can we use those lessons in our personal and professional endeavors? And, how do the lessons from business lit connect to the coaching approach?

Right away I came across a Harvard Business School article entitled, "Managing Innovation: Controlled Chaos." Among the success factors, a couple of things stood out to me. The first is Need Orientation, which is roughly: approaching potential customers early, testing solutions in users' hands, learning from the interactions, and adapting (I have paraphrased from the article). This speaks to a person's determination and willingness to adapt and try new approaches. Other factors were being Fanatic and having a Long Time Horizon.

Another article, "Value Innovation: The Strategic Logic of High Growth" suggests that companies that flounder are playing a "Keep up with the Joneses" game. Instead, the success strategy is to make competitors irrelevant by using a logic called Value Innovation, meaning that you redefine what the real product need is.

Translating this into coaching terms, we talk about periods of "conscious incompetence." This would correspond to the idea of controlled chaos. You jump into a black hole, you don't know what's going on, but you let your values and vision serve as your guide. That way, you can be true to yourself even while you are open to the mistakes that allow you to learn. As for Value Innovation, who are you comparing yourself to? Where should your focus really be? And finally, the idea of a long time horizon translates to not being married to the outcome. Yes, you want your vision to succeed, but you are open to the changes and improvements to it that your learning provides.

So, where are you finding that your existing approach isn't working? How courageous are you to try something new?

Steak

A few weeks ago we stayed with friends who served us steak. These friends are thin, healthy and full of energy. I was totally intrigued. So much so that I admitted that I'd never really cooked steak as an adult and the few times I did it didn't turn out so well. You see, I'd allowed the common belief that red meat is bad to become an absolute. Rather than enjoy it in moderation, I'd eliminated it completely.

I've started making steak whenever I want, which amounts to about once a week. What a difference. I realized that steak nourishes me physically, but also mentally. It feels like an itch that I finally scratched. I have more energy, have actually lost, not gained weight, and somehow feel like my world got bigger.

So, where are you carrying stories about what you shouldn't do? Are there friendships you don't pursue because you think they aren't right for you? Is there a career direction that you constantly talk yourself out of? Is there a trip you want to take? Where are the, "Yeah, but..s" in your life? What would it be like to scratch that itch? What nourishment and abundance are you keeping at bay?

Crafting

In the last couple of weeks, I've been enchanted by the theme of crafting. On my vacation I discovered a copy of The Grapes of Wrath in the house and was surprised at how rapt I was. I absolutely plowed through it. I was amazed at how John Steinbeck told a story within a literary texture that makes the reader feel the emotions and circumstances of the characters all the more. Then, this past weekend my husband and I saw The Kids Are All Right. Again, crafting was everywhere. Mark Ruffalo's character owns an organic Alice Waters style restaurant whose ingredients come from his own organic garden. Then in one scene, Annette Bening's character tells Mark Ruffalo's "If you want a family so badly, why don't you go out and make your own!"

I found comfort in both works around the theme of family. In an age where so much is written about the dissatisfaction that parents feel, it is nice to see an homage to the what is built with years of effort. But the metaphor holds true for whatever life we live. I love to watch a client really discover his or her authentic self, then craft their life around the newly discovered values. Sometimes the change is sudden and immediate, sometimes it is gradual. But I do know that once the client discovers it, to live that life becomes absolutely urgent. A cousin of mine this summer shared a quote, "Tout bonheur est un chef d'oeuvre. It means, "Every happiness is a work of art." So, like a well-crafted work of art, an authentic life is a thing of beauty.

Re-calibration

Just back from two weeks of vacation and am feeling amazed. Before leaving I wrote about my intention to re-calibrate during this break. Wow, maybe it was that intention or maybe it was just creating a void, but I really did come home with a lot of clarity.

My vacation was in France. I was bringing my children to see the extended family for the first time. The expectations around what it meant for me, the knowledge that it would be difficult on the children because of the language, and the experience of having felt the difference in child-rearing styles as a child myself made it a loaded visit. I had a lot of hope and apprehension around it. Mostly that I would feel pressure to show my children off as passably French. That they should behave well and be charming and that I should be able to absorb all of the cultural differences so that their experience would be stress-free.

Well, not quite. It was wonderful. I got to share more than I'd hoped. Walking on the beach I shared with my mother as a child, climbing the rocks along the seashore, and getting the rare and wonderful pleasure of a full day of traditional Breton dancing. On the other side, there were long and tiring moments during which I saw my kids struggling and during which I struggled to stay true to my own, American style of parenting. It may sound minor, but anyone who has grown up juggling cultures knows that it is a big challenge.

So in the end, I was able to be myself most of the time. I was able to let go of old stories about how things should be and integrate my different worlds in a patchwork that was present and authentic. It was incredible liberating. The moments in life when you can be excited about going away, and equally excited about coming home to the life you've built are truly a pleasure.

Vacating

Today I leave for two weeks of vacation with my family. I love looking at the origins of words. In the case of vacation, the people who made up the word all those years ago knew that the key thought here is vacating. Vacating a home, presumably. But it also makes me think of vacating your mind, vacating your schedule, vacating the routine of your life.

When I was 34 I went on an extended vacation. I quit my job, traveled for two months, and then freelanced for a year. It was great. I remember thinking, intentionally, that I was creating a black hole. I was creating a vacancy for what was to come. I didn't know what it was, so it took some courage, but I did understand the importance of not trying to create the future from the past. Creating empty space makes room for something new, for growth.

These two weeks I am looking forward to making space for re-calibration. I am into my second year with two children and just beginning my third year of my career change and new business. I don't know exactly what the new normal will look like, but I do know that creating the vacancy is the first step.