Expectation Overload

This week I promised myself I'd find something other to write about than Tiger Woods. Nevertheless, I find myself thinking about it. Specifically, I am intrigued by the notion that women today have to wear so many hats. Many of us, Like Tiger's wife Elin, are raised to be 'good girls'. Presentable, sophisticated, good wives, good mothers. Today we find that we also have to be, and I say this euphemistically, an exotic and wild girl.

Once upon a time, it was clear how you had to be. Roles were defined. Deviate too much and you lost support from those around. Nowadays, it is much more complicated. Good girl, but naughty too; smart, but vulnerable too; nurturing and feminine, but a shark at work. It reminds me of a computer with too many apps open...it melts down!

One of the things I do with clients is to clarify values. Really separating what they want from the expectations of others, whether it be parents, teachers, bosses or media. So often, those expectations have been internalized. What most find is that when they operate from our own values, they cease to be a cartoon; their experience takes on so much more dimension. They have the freedom to be good girl and naughty without worrying about it. That comfort and confidence drives personal and professional life so that they are much more effective, balanced and fulfilled.