Making Lemondade

These days it seems easy to talk about what is limiting us. We have been in a tough economy for three years, the employment landscape is constantly shifting, especially if you work in Financial Services. And yet, there are a lot of people still finding jobs and doing well...yes, within the 99% crowd!

Last Wednesday on the 1 train I was reminded of the power of thinking positive and then acting on it. There was a 17 year old boy playing percussion on a bucket. Really well. When he was done, he gave a pitch that mobilized the entire train to give him money. I've never seen anything like it. He said, "I am not on drugs. I am not homeless. I am not hungry. I am an inner city kid trying to stay out of trouble. If you can give a donation, it will keep me out of trouble until I can find a real job.

Wow. What an amazing choice he made. It can't be easy to decide to go into the subway to make a living. But this young man made a decision that he would take charge of what he can influence, and that was his selling pitch. First, he identified with his audience. By saying he had a place to live, food to eat, and was hard working, he said he was like them. Second, he framed the challenge for the crowd. Instead of chronic unsolvable problems, he presented a short-term, manageable challenge that the people felt they could influence. And third, he spoke from a place of positivity and gratitude. Rather than complain, he talked about the positive things in his life and the influence he wants to have.

So, this is not meant to be a moralistic post about positive thinking. On the contrary. It is meant more as a To Do list to create more positive outcomes. Next time you want something... a new job, a promotion, a relationship, how about asking:

1) What can I express to show that I am like my audience?

2) How can this problem be framed to be achievable? Then, present the call to action.

3) What can I say about the positivity of my situation and the positive impact I want to make on the organization in the future?

Taking small actions from a positive perspective is a powerful way to shift the tide in your favor. Good luck!

The Pace of Change

Last Thursday as I was walking down 66th street, I saw an old and dear friend walking down the block toward me. We were both on cell phones. We saw each other, hesitated as if we might stop, then gave each other a wave and look that said, "Can't talk...let's catch up later." When I told my husband about it, he said, "Wow, that never would have happened in the olden days." Then we both realized: The "olden days" is 1998! It seems unquestionable that we are living in a time of unprecedented change. For so many of us, especially those with children, juggling uncertainty has always been a challenge. Yet the uncertainty we live with today goes much deeper than it has in the past. Many of the foundations that Baby Boomers relied on -- lifetime employment, marriage, economic growth, a phone call instead of a text -- have completely shifted. All this, and a tsunami of information that is almost impossible to sift through. So, how do we create the change we want in our lives, rather than just react to the change and information happening all around us? Maybe the place to start is within. In my very first newsletter I introduced the Wheel of Life, and it seems appropriate to share it again today. Taking a look at each section, what would the experience of that element of your life look like as a perfect 10? Where are you seeing a significant gap between that description and what it looks like today? What would be possible if that section were a perfect 10? And, who would you be? How about planning 2012 with that person in mind?

Year End Push and Pull

This time of year, I find myself in a push-pull dynamic. The expectation of the new year is pushing me forward, but the intense activity of the three months since "back-to-school" is pulling me towards being passive. What can we do to put things in motion so that the New Year can ease in gently? Like the wind-up in a tennis serve, taking a look back can help power your planning. Here are some review questions that are more personal than the typical work review. They are adapted from my own coach (www.coachcat.com) and have been very helpful to me:

Who was I in 2011? At the end of the year versus the beginning?

When was I powerful? What was I doing?

When was I fearful? When did I impede my own progress?

Who/what supported me when I was at my best?

What were my Successes?

What were my Oprah moments?

Where did I fail in my objectives?

Where did I let myself down?

What are the habits I am ready to leave behind?

What changes in myself am I happy about?

What do I see now that I didn't see at the beginning of the year?

I find this exercise indulgent and practical all at once. I hope you enjoy it.